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Monthly Archives: March 2017
It’s Friday
Now…there are those times when a plan just comes off perfect. It’s not all the time. It’s not even most of the time. Some of the time, you even fall flat, right into a pile of embarrassment. But, if you don’t ever take risks, then you’ll never have a story to tell where all the planets align and you get to be a hero. This day is one of those days where it all pans out so well that I won’t even try to take all the credit. There were no cell phones, so I couldn’t call anyone inside to find out when a scary scene was coming up. No matter. When you don’t have enough information, you’re going off your gut, and the universe comes alongside and shows you the way. And that makes success smell all the more sweet. I had a plan, so… Continue reading →
Posted in High School Years, Keepin' Weird Stories
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Tagged 1990's, eighteenth birthday, funny story, high school, pop culture, right of passage, scary movies, story, tadow, teenage prank
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The Eighth Word You Can’t Say on TV
…but, this room is dead silent. As I scan the crowd, I notice not many people are making eye contact. The woman front and center is leaned back like a theatre patron sitting too close to the screen with her eyes slightly bugged out of her head, arms stiff, mouth ajar, as she glances around furtively to get a look at the people around her. I’m more than a little nonplused because I’m in rare form. I can’t figure it out! “What’s up with these people?”… Continue reading →
Posted in Keepin' Weird Stories
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Tagged dirty words, funny story, george carlin, Keep Austin Weird, Keepin' Weird, seven dirty words, story, Weird Stories
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Flux Capacitor Optional
…at that, I realize that I had probably used one too many napkins about a half a pint in to the project and feel obliged to tell her the story about 1993 and the prettiest girl in Texas to make up for depleting her paper stock. She sympathizes and says, “Ooohhhh…that’s rough” and then jokes that, “all the cocktail napkins in the world aren’t going to make up for that bonehead move”. As she replenishes the dispenser…. Continue reading →
Posted in High School Years, Keepin' Weird Stories
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Tagged 1990's, flux capacitor, funny story, high school, Keep Austin Weird, Keepin' Weird, short story, story, time travel
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The Dukes of Smith County (AKA: Dude, I lost my muffins)
…Josh seconds my motion to stop off and fuel up (I’m craving some blueberry muffins and a Dr. Pepper). As I pop open the package we get back onto the road and checked the route. Here’s the next logistics problem. We failed to go over the plan in advance and with less than a year of driving experience, don’t know the city roads well. Checking the clock, Josh gets nervous because if we don’t deliver all of the papers by the deadline, the customers don’t have to pay the bill and he gets docked or maybe even fired. Since we’re behind schedule, he’s driving like a bat out of hell. I’m not feelin’ the rush so I’m like, “dude, you don’t have to speed, the papers aren’t going anywhere”. Not only does he ignore my advise, but … Continue reading →
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